My Journey
My journey of trying to make sense of myself and the world around me began at an early age. I lost my father to addiction right before my third birthday and slowly watched others in my family succumb to the powerful draw of addiction and eventually death. When I looked back on my family tree, it seemed that it had been there as far back as we could trace. In high school, I was already reading my mother’s self-help books and studying transcendental meditation in an effort to figure out the cause of suffering in and around me. I struggled with bouts of depression, addiction, and suicidal thoughts as early as 14 years old. I would vacillate between my two coping strategies of hyper-rebellious and hyper-religious which exacerbated the disappointment I felt in myself and those around me. When I found myself unexpectedly pregnant at the age of 19, I agreed to get married and start a family in the hopes that it would give me a chance to create the fulfillment I so desperately craved. Unhealed trauma, marriage and young motherhood was the most difficult emotional concoction I’ve ever navigated. I began having flashbacks of childhood trauma, events that had been buried for years were surfacing. I found it increasingly difficult to stay emotionally regulated and was easily and frequently irritated and quick tempered. Luckily, I found my way through and out the other side with the help of healed family members and friends I’ve made along the way. I joined a 12-step community in 2002 and have grown to love the people there and the process. It proved to be a lifesaving starting point for me and now I incorporate my knowledge of trauma healing into the work I do with others and the unique approach I take to the 12-step process.
Over the years, I’ve participated in and been a student of many therapeutic models and teachers including Jungian psychology, Ego State, Gestalt, Imago, EMDR, psychodrama, parts work, DBT / Mindfulness, Breathwork, Tapping (EFT), Reiki, Hemi-Sync, PSYCH-K and various forms of guided imagery / inquiry. Influenced by authors like Dr. Gabor Maté, Brené Brown, Emmet Fox, Neale Donald Walsch, Jeff Foster, Byron Katie’s “The Work”, and Don Miguel Ruiz’s Agreements.
Through it all I’ve learned that I belong only to myself – no one else. When my interactions and relations flow from this understanding, there is so much more ease and less disappointment, judgement, or expectation. I have also learned that the only way through emotion is to allow it to come up and through me. I spent so many years trying to figure it all out, not realizing I was looking for a way to not have to feel it. I have greater access to joy in my everyday life, and my hope is that will be one of the results that carry over to you in our work together.
Whether you’re looking to explore the hidden drivers behind compulsive behavior, codependency, depressed states or any other self-defeating behavior, my goal will be to meet you where you are in a spirit of compassion and curiosity. I believe in the body’s natural pull towards healing and when we do the uncomfortable work to clear the way, blockages naturally take care of themselves and free us up for healthier expression of our life force…our FIRE!